my other side

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Written on July 2, 2007 – 10:37 pm | by ruzell-masiglat

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sleeping with someone…

Written on June 18, 2007 – 1:46 am | by ruzell-masiglat

i slept with someone, with the essence of wholesome meaning of sleeping in bed with a guy beside me and not in a sensual way. though it was only for a short span of time but, somehow i felt so secure beside him. all my worries and insecurities inside vanish. he made me feel like i am, dreaming the most amazing and wonderful dream that i, do not want to wake up anymore but, i am awake in did. when i turn around there i was facing him face to face i, even feel the warmth of air he breathe. i was trying to see his face in a dark and a thought wishing that, that night never ends. i wished to kiss him but i did not, besides lying in a cushion with him is enough. plus, the fact that we have no connections like a girl and boy relationship. knowing that when i open my eyes and someone is there besides me is such a great satisfaction i could ever imagine. thinking it again that he was there with me, it gives me a shiver because i know it was just it sleeping with a friend a guy friend. it was so me someone who will never done anything unpredictable because i am such a good girl too good.. And he was not mine..

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something about cellphones

Written on April 25, 2007 – 4:30 pm | by ruzell-masiglat

most of the time people see me having a new cellphone from cheaper to the latest issue of mobile phones. i do not know but somehow i think i have a passion or fetish with mobile phones here are few in the list of the mobile unit that i used to have motorola 2 liner was the first i forgot the model called then another motorola the laptop look alike mobile phone with blue and green series and mine was blue. off course i used to have a nokia 5110 the most durable of them all and first 4 liner mobile phone. i used to have a sendo, 7110 nokia 2 units sony ericsson t68, t610, z200, p800, k700i nokia 6600 2 units before nokia 7060, nokia 6510, 3210, n70, motorola v3x and the rest are history and i might even add more on my list actually ihave a new target on the mall but i have no budget for now but am sure soon am gonna buy that mobile phone for sure..
i do not know why or what i am looking for a mobile phone i just like to have them and if i do not feel like it anymore i either sale it or swap it to another unit. i guess am applying a motto of do not make your self to attached to something so that if it is gone you wont feel hurt. or am just so amaze with the  mobile phone  at i got attracted to them.. there is something with the cellphones really…

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thought of the day

Written on January 20, 2007 – 3:14 pm | by ruzell-masiglat

someone utter this word to me "ikinukumpara mo yung sarili mo sa kanya?! akala mo ba mas magaling ka sa kanya? wala kang sinabi sa kanya!" that what is on my thought of the day. actually i never did compare myself to her nor to anyone because i know they are much better than i am. i always end up to be the second best that is my expertise i must say. thought of it make my self esteem even lower than before. am i a fool?, yes, i guess i am a fool letting someone said it to me without hesitation and accept it just like that. does it hurt? yes it does hurt my feelings and most especially my ego. thou it happened a long time ago a time like this it still ache as i thought about it, i must admit it. i never complained it to anyone how i really felt that time because i guess that the right thing to do then. besides it is my nature not to complain nor to speak about my feelings. i am used to it, that no one is available when it is my turn to share my stories, thoughts,ideas suggestions and more.  it may seem that i am complaining it to all of you now which is too late but  i am not, i am just letting go of the thought of those words. it may not the good site to elaborate my feelings but i have no other means so just bare with me. anyways it is my blog my space and this is all i have, so deal with it..

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just this morning…

Written on November 21, 2006 – 5:21 am | by ruzell-masiglat

just this morning i realize that am starting to like someone. unexpectedly that am going to felt this way for him. this is what happened early this day when i saw him again after a rest from work, am not expecting that i will going to see him today. as i remember his duty will be tomorrow for some reason he appear in our working area, and suddenly i felt like i was happy and excited to see him. yes, i  often see him from work but i never felt this way when i saw him this day. usually it was just another day of work with him teasing and making fun of me. and this morning it was one of the unexpected and amazing day of my life. i felt like am falling in love with him.. but before you say “haayy, ooh ahh” he had a girlfriend but i dont care coz am not expecting him to fall for someone  like me. i just like the feeling of being enlighten and happy. and to tell you the truth i cannot wait to see him again on the other day and have lunch with him or dinner for that matter. i dont really care if this means another duty with him and another day of  teasing and joking with each other. i just learn to love it and i cannot wait to do it again.. and another thing that  i fall i guess because lately hes so gentle and sweet always asking me to accompany him!!! yihi! kakakilig!

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old couple

Written on November 7, 2006 – 7:38 pm | by ruzell-masiglat

recently i witness a sweet moments of old couple. actually this was happened yesterday as i trans out one of my patient from icu. the story goes like this.. nagaabang na kami nung pgnt na kasama ko pababa from 3600 tas may nagaabang din na old couple sa may harap ng elevator, tas yung matandang babae naiyak sa tuwa (tears of  joys ika nga) tapos sabi nung asawa nia yun matandang lalaki (sya yung naconfine) with open arms sabi nya halika nga dito sabay yakap sa asawa nia. at habang nasa loob na kami ng elevator sabi nung matandang babae yan makakakain na ko ng kanin mamaya kasi nandyn ka na. akala ko iiwan mo na ko eh. ang sweet nila at hindi mahiyain yung matandang lalake na ipakita na he really love his wife. naisip ko tuloy sana pagtanda ko ganun din yung mahanap kong partner.. at sana sa pag tanda ko hindi ako nagiisa ayokong tumandang magisa. the story is very petty i know but that the facts of life i witness yesterday was so really and true. i am really touch with the old couple.. i just want to share the story to you guys who viewed my blogs…

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sharing my opinion…

Written on January 18, 2006 – 3:36 pm | by ruzell-masiglat

i just want to express my opinion regarding the latest issue that was happening to the workplace i am belong to…  in the first place i admit that i feel bad i had the possibility to be one of the candidate to relocate another area of workplace, fortunately not yet… okay back to the thoughts that i had in mind. i  find it odd  that people in our workplace did not want to be relocate to our area, simple because they do not find it "special area". likewise to what they think, i find it special not just because i used to it but in a lot of reason. it is hard to explain how, but it is i swear. one of the reason i can give is you can test your ability, capacity,intellect and even  your skill. and one of the reason  i am voicing this out, is  i, cannot accept for the fact that people really need to do letters addressed to the superior of my workplace to tell that they do not want to be remove to where they are now. and using the reason because they cannot use the skilled that they have learned to the place where i am assigned to. maybe, you will think this are all about ego, yes partly it is true because my pride and my ego where busted of what i heard, but even though. this is my stand being good or expert does not applied only in so called "special area" but most probably in all places.  excellency cannot be said excellent not unless it was tested. expertise, excellency,etc can be shown or seen anytime, anywhere we do not need to choose where or when…

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me and my broken heart…

Written on September 29, 2005 – 6:00 am | by ruzell-masiglat

yuletide seasons of last year was accidentally the year for me and my friends to brought our own partner (a.k.a.lover) in our yearly christmas celebration, but unfortunately my suppose to be new lovestory ended so soon that it was not even last to become a real relationship. it was more of assumed relationship (or in other words mutual understanding) actually i wasn’t sure if that was mutual. but definitely i felt something for that guy and definitely i know i loved him. i am open to say this now because i can say that i am quite over about him. yes quite because from time to time i still wish i still have him. unfortunately he fell in love with his so called bestfriend. i am not bitter, but to share to you the truth i’ve felt that  he was my answered prayer but it turns out be someone’s else answered prayer. i thought he was the man of my dreams, i thought when i fall in love with a guy older than i am i can feel the security and sencerity of a real relationship or love that i am looking for in a long time. i never permit anyone to enter my world but my friends but when i met this guy i made an exemption. i tried to share my world with him and i’ve showed my affections and love to him i thought we are doing great. i dont know what happen, one day after he went to our house and met my family i suddenly felt his coldness and apathetic approached. the 24\7 texting that were doing became less and less then it stop. i never know what the real reason behind it, i can never ask becasue it was to late to asked but i know even though he never mentioned it, it was most probably about her. i always end up with someone like him someone who had no intention of loving me seriously. napapagod na yun puso umasa sa mga taong tulad nya lagi na lang pinaglalaruan yun nararamdaman ko. nananahimik naman ako dito sa isang tabi yung masaya na ako na ang buhay ko eh ang barkada at pamilya ko. tapos may dadating at may manggugulo tapos iiwan lang din naman ako. i am getting tired of the same story that happenning in my life sana ang wish ko lang seryosohin nyo naman ako kasi hindi naman ako nakikipagbiruan. pagod na ako… 

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either in a good mood nor bad mood…

Written on September 27, 2005 – 4:34 am | by ruzell-masiglat

as of this moment i am cool and i am not hot temper or in a bad mood. obviusly am in the mood to write my opinion and my observation.i can’t help but i just like to ask this questions. Yes! you read me right questions with S more than one. okey let me start with this… have you ever felt that you want to shout and yell (as if there is no tomorrow) because of anger? but you cannot do it because you have to keep your temper down and cool. have you ever felt like you dont want to care anymore of what other people’s opinion? and in the first place why do we care so much of what other people’s going to say or think? why are there a lot of people who are hypocrite? why do we have to pretend we are fine when the truth is we are not? why do we  have to show we are nice when it is not what you feel inside? why do people say it is okey when it is not? why do people say that they understand even though they don’t? wonder why i am asking? because lately i’ve been in a situation when i felt like a volcano that ready to erupt anytime without warning because of the anger. but still i have to showed to the people around me my trade mark of  "smiling face". haven’t they notice that i am in a bad mood? have i lost my right to feel angry? i like to speak in a high tone of my voice but still i had to think or feel other people’s feelings if i do it. why can it be, that’s how i feel so deal with! i know i had to respect the feelings of the other people around me but how about me? sometimes i felt like i always understand them but they never understood me. i felt like no one listen to what i said and no one bother to ask if i am okey or if i still alive. i don’t know i just feel like it from time to time. sana pwede yung pag galit ka galit ka period no question ask. or if your happy happy ka lang. or in the other hand pag gusto mo umiyak edi umiyak ka. yung free ka sa kahit anong gawin mo yun you dont have to think you just felt like doing it. i dont know sometimes i felt like i just want to run i dont know where to go but i just like to do it. maybe my mind is preoccuppied of a lot of things problem happiness future love family work career dreams like and a lot more.i just like to share my insanity and my incapacity of understanding myself. i just like to be free from everything even just for one day. can it be possible? i hope so..

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you got me at simple things….

Written on August 31, 2005 – 5:26 am | by ruzell-masiglat

today someone used to be special in my heart approach me. for the first time after the long time that we’re not talking he made a move and talk to me.and he called out my name, it was a nice feeling hearing him calling my name again. ang babaw ko no? but its true. actually the story was quite simple he approached me to say thank you because i remember his birthday. in his facial expression i saw that he was so amazed and stunt that i remember that small detail about him. and he also said "wow naalala mo yun birthday ko?! thank you ulit ha!" it may seem simple but actually it made me smile. i felt like we can go back to what we used to be but then again i guess not.. simple things really make me happy simple things he did even though he didnt mean it it made me happy but unfortunately he doesnt notice.. weird talaga kasi i still fall for him.. oh god i still want him so badly…..

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